RELEASE VALVE

August 4th, 2019

A common misconception about meditative practice is that one concentrates on a sense of calm and peace.  It’s all a bit froo-froo from the sounds of it.

Many people who look as though they practice meditation also believe this is what it’s about.

If anything, a sense of calm equanimity is a by-product, not the actual product of a meditative practice.

Think of a cashier, manning a till all day.  During the whole shift there is a constant line of people waiting to be dealt with, holding items for purchase, wanting to pay.  All day, the cashier rings in items and takes payment, and all day, when each person is finished paying, they go in a loop and get back in line.  And it never ends.

For many people this is the mental status quo: just a constant, never-ending stream of looping thoughts.

A meditative practice eventually enables a person to get to the end of a shift, giving each thought it’s due and letting it go. 

Think of that cashier again, closing up shop, going home , flopping down on the couch and finally breathing a sigh of relief.  That relaxing calmness is a by product of a day well worked and over, it’s not the direct result of such work.

So too is the case for a meditative practice that is starting to work.  A person can finally get relief from thoughts that have hither-to been never ending.

Meditation becomes, first, a workshop where each of us can build and tinker with a release valve for the mind.

AUDIO DANCE PARTNER

August 3rd, 2019

First person yells, second person yells. 

First person yells louder, second person yells louder

First person screams, second person screams.

Things just don’t get better.  Hopefully, ideally, this sort of thing just collapses into silence and both walk away.  And when such people see each other again?  What are the chances that they begin again at one of those higher registers of volume?  

The chance is certainly there.

What about if we go in the other direction?  It’s counter-intuitive to speak with lower volume, but what happens when someone doesn’t hear what they wanted to hear?

They lean in.

What does that leaning in communicate to the person speaking?

Someone’s listening.

Now, are we more or less likely to get louder when we feel that someone is listening? 

It’s a no brainer:

people don’t get loud when they feel like someone is listening.

That’s basic human connection, and it functions like traction.

When a car wheel loses traction and starts spinning in the snow, gassing up the engine and spinning that wheel faster isn’t going to do anything productive.

Got to start over.  Slow down. 

Decrease that volume.

Grab traction, get in step and move on.

We match one another no matter how detrimental it is. 

The trick is realizing that any change you make will also be matched. 

COZY MIND

August 2nd, 2019

A bucket of mud is no place for an origami flower.

That paper flower would instantly soak and bloat, wrinkle and whither until nothing is left but a sloppy mess.

A paper flower is an intricate and delicate construction, and in order for it to, well, flourish, it needs the right environment, like a clean dry table on which it can be displayed.

Some thoughts and ideas are like this origami flower.  They require a certain environment in order to be constructed and appreciated.

Many people do not have a mind that can host a good thought.   Think of all the self-deprecating thoughts that are running around in people’s mind right now.  How many people would – if they could some how be relieved of this self-depreciation – start work on a nice little idea they have.  An idea that is currently squashed by the heavy dominance of negative thoughts? 

Great things have small beginnings,

but

 small beginnings require the right environment to continue.

BUCKET OF MUD

August 1st, 2019

Most people carry around a bucket of mud in their heads.  Without some sort of filter, or drain, there’s little or no ability for all the negative unhelpful stuff that pops up in the course of mental life to get out of the head.

The image of the prospector comes in useful here: how far would a prospector get if he tried to sift for gold with a solid bucket?  Well a solid bucket allows for no sifting at all.  There’s no way to drain out the useless stuff.

Imagine for a moment, someone who thinks a useless, unhelpful thought regularly for years and years.  Perhaps there was an embarrassing episode that no one else remembers that is a constant source of re-embarrassment.  It’s like a wild animal trapped inside the cage of the skull, wreaking havoc, allowing no space for any other potentially useful thoughts.

Only by letting that whack-thought of an animal out of the brain can we make space for another thought or idea that has any hope of being helpful, pleasurable or beneficial.

But instead, many people carry around a bucket of useless mud in terms of the thoughts and concepts that inhabit their mind.

What’s in your bucket?

WHAT MEDITATION DOES

July 31st, 2019

The basic foundational ingredient of a meditation practice is awareness. It’s the opposite of having a head in the clouds.

To be lost in thoughts. 

Day-dreaming.

A meditative practice simply makes it more likely that you will take a step back and look at what’s going on.  Not just situationally but mentally.  For example, anxiety often emerges from some thought that we can’t stop thinking.  The thought might be about some impending event, or something embarrassing that happened.  In comparison, anxiety is rarely about what is actually going on in the moment.  A meditative practice equips someone with the ability to step back and recognize the anxiety, and the thought for what it is.  With enough practice, these detrimental feelings fade in their power and ability to consume our minds.  But even in the short term, merely being able to take a step back and recognize the intoxicating process that is occurring has huge benefits.

Ultimately, meditation poses a question to one’s self:

is this where I want my attention to be?

If the answer is yes, then great.

Otherwise, meditative practice allows one’s self to let go of the current mental concept or state.

What comes next is some what up to chance.  We can’t really predict what our next thought will be once the current thought is out of the way.

In this sense it’s a bit like sifting for gold.  We can constantly let go of the useless dirt and when a shiny nugget of gold comes along, we can hold on to it for a little bit.

Without this ability, we can get stuck thinking about some useless and potentially harmful object of mind for ridiculous amounts of time.

Our head is, essentially a static bucket of mud without the ability to sift. 

Meditation, at the end of the day, is a simple ability to sift out all the unhelpful mental….

stuff.

This episode references Episode 347: Predicting Thoughts and Episode 473: Bucket of Mud